


I Know in My Heart It's Not You

by aweewah



Series: I Caught Myself [2]
Category: Bandom, Bring Me The Horizon, Paramore, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Drama, F/M, Romance, Warped Tour
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-18
Updated: 2013-12-27
Packaged: 2018-01-01 22:39:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 20,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1049392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aweewah/pseuds/aweewah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just how did Hayley and Oli get together?</p><p>The year is 2009. It's been two years since Hayley Williams and Josh Farro had broken up. Two years since Paramore had almost fallen apart. Despite all their issues, the band overcame them, stayed together, and are now playing a surprise show for Warped Tour.</p><p>In between those two years, Hayley had met Oliver Sykes and they immediately became friends, yet haven't seen each other in a while. When she finds out that Bring Me the Horizon is playing on Warped, she meets back with him and he's happy to see her again.</p><p>New and old feelings soon arise and Hayley realizes that she doesn't know what she wants, as she is afraid that she'll make things fall apart again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. When the Girl with Flaming Orange Hair Met the Boy Covered in Ink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> February 2008: Paramore cancels European tour dates to deal with "personal issues".

**February 2008**

 

Alone.  
  
Hayley just wanted to be alone because she was overwhelmed by all of the chaotic and exhausting events that had happened in the past few months. Even though it was cold outside and the guys were probably worried about where she could be, she didn't want to move from where she was sitting. She was on the sidewalk in downtown Franklin and her eyes closed as she let the cool wind blow against her face. It was relaxing to her and she took a few deep breaths to help calm herself even more.  
  
Her eyes were still shut as she listened to the sounds of footsteps hitting the pavement and various voices of strangers chatting with each other on the streets. She finally opened her eyes and observed her surroundings, noticing that some people were staring at her. Probably wondering why this girl was sitting on a busy sidewalk all by herself. At seeing these people and seeing where she was, her relaxed state slowly faded away as she realized that she was still in this town when she wasn't even supposed to be there in the first place.  
  
She wasn't supposed to be in her hometown, she wasn't supposed to be filming some music video, and she wasn't supposed to be on the streets biting her nails in fear that the fate of the band wasn't going to last very long. She was supposed to be touring in Europe for all those fans that had waited for months to see Paramore perform. All those fans that scraped money to purchase their tickets and begged their parents to let them go. They worked extra hours at their part-time jobs to earn enough cash to buy at least one t-shirt from the merch booth and some of them had even planned to skip school and avoid some test they didn't study for. All for a show that wasn't even going to happen anymore.  
  
She let her fans down.  
  
At first, it was only just one show. Then it turned to two shows, and soon the rest of their European tour was canceled altogether and they simply told their fans that their reasons for doing this was to deal with "personal issues". To say that was an understatement and she couldn't help but blame herself for causing things to go downhill.  
  
Just a year ago, she felt like the band was on top of the world. They had released their newest album and were gaining more fans, inspiring so many people. She was living her dream and the band was her second family. It was almost like they were unstoppable and that they would get through anything because they were doing what they've always wanted to do and life was great. Of course, nothing made her happier than the fact that she enjoyed all of this while in the arms of Josh Farro. Her best friend, her guitarist, and her boyfriend. Everything just seemed so  _perfect_.  
  
But good things never last. As the band became well known throughout the United States and other countries in the world, the media decided to focus more on Hayley and make the guys almost nonexistent. The first person to call this out was Josh and because he usually responds to things so emotionally and doesn't think of how his words can get out of hand, Hayley didn't respond so well either. Zac, Taylor, and Jeremy tried to mediate, but then they also ended up arguing and it went from bad to worse. It also wasn't just the issues regarding the media. Josh and Hayley were no longer together and Hayley was actually the one who decided to end the relationship.  
  
She thought it wasn't healthy for her to be with him and she also didn't want it to affect the band. Hayley and Josh haven't been the same in months and it was obvious that their relationship was fractured at the moment, even if they agreed to stay friends for the sake of the band. Unfortunately for her, it ended up affecting the band anyway and things just started to fall apart. All because of her and she wished things didn't end up the way they did. They weren't as indestructible as they thought they were. It was more accurate to say that they were hanging by a thread and it had gotten to the point where everyone could agree with this.  
  
Once news of their tour getting cancelled got out, rumors spread that the band was definitely going to break up and the scariest part was that she felt no urge at all to disagree with this statement or assure people that this wasn't going to happen. It seemed to be going that direction, but she didn't want to admit that out loud. A small part of her still wanted to believe that they were going to fix things.  
  
Which is why she was sitting there on the cold concrete, pulling her knees to her chest and hugging them. It was only a week after they came back home from Europe and they were going to film a music video for their latest single, "That's What You Get". It was going to be low-key and their director had even told them to bring all their friends to make the shoot seem more down to Earth. However, that night Hayley wondered if this was really good for them or not. Was filming this video really going to change things or would it turn out to be their way of saying "goodbye" to their fans? Would it be their last video? With all these thoughts, she wanted to clear her head. That was why she got into her beloved car, Ms. Anne, and drove off without telling anyone where she was going.  
  
She didn't even know how long she had been sitting there, but she wanted to at least sit there for a few more hours and ignore how late it was getting. She didn't need the media following her and making her feel like she was some sort of attention whore. The guys didn't have to be there to try and cheer her up. Nobody had to be there. For that moment, right there on the sidewalk, all she wanted was to be alone and enjoy the silence as she temporarily pushed all her worries away and allowed herself to relax once more.  
  
"You alright?"  
  
Yet again, Hayley's relaxation was cut short when she heard a voice from behind her. She turned her head to see a guy in his twenties standing there with his hands in the pockets of his jacket. He had dark brown chin-length hair and she noticed on his neck a tattoo of a rose. Actually, he had more than just a rose and she saw that most of his neck was covered in intricate artwork, leading her to guess that he probably had more that she couldn't see. His eyes appeared to be hazel and seeing that these eyes met hers, it was obvious that she was the one he had spoken to and even though she didn't quite know who this person was, they did seem familiar to her.  
  
Remembering he had asked a question, she shrugged. "I'm fine. Why?"  
  
"You don't seem fine to me," he said. "You seem a bit sad, actually."  
  
Hearing his British accent, it became evident that he wasn't from around here and it only made her even more curious about who he could possibly be. Where had she seen him before? Though that didn't bother her as much as the fact that it was apparently obvious that she was upset about something because this stranger managed to call bullshit on her lie.  
  
Hayley just scoffed. "Well, sad doesn't even begin to explain how I really feel right now."  
  
The guy stepped forward and sat down beside her, to which she averted her eyes and instead gazed at the street ahead of her. She sighed, trying to indicate that she wasn't in the best of moods to talk to some random person about her personal issues. After all, the whole purpose of her being there was to be alone, but this guy didn't seem to take a hint.  
  
He rested his chin on his hand. "What could Hayley Williams of Paramore possibly be sad about?"  
  
She faced him, her eyes widening at the mention of her name. As if things weren't already distressing enough, she found out she was sitting with some guy who actually knew who she was. Is that why he seemed familiar? Either he was some fan or they had met before and neither of those possibilities weren't as exciting at the moment. She already felt like she was disappointing so many fans and if he  _was_  someone she had met before, she would be ridden with guilt for not recognizing them.  
  
"How do you know who I am?" she asked.  
  
"I've heard of you before," he smirked. "A lot of people hear about Paramore, especially if you're someone like me who's also in a band. We all somehow hear about each other."  
  
"You're in a band?" Hayley leaned closer. "You do look familiar and I've been trying to figure out why. Who are you?"  
  
"Oh, sorry for not telling you earlier," he extended a hand. "I'm Oliver Sykes, but you can just call me Oli."  
  
Her eyes then lit up at the familiar name. That was why she thought she had seen him before because she  _did_  know who he was. She mentally slapped herself for not recognizing him sooner and finally shook his hand.  
  
"I know you," she told him. "You're in that band, Bring Me the Horizon. I'm so sorry for not realizing who you were right away."  
  
Oli just gave her a slight smile. "It's okay. Honestly, it's nice that you know who I am because that pretty much proved my point that all bands somehow hear about each other."  
  
To her surprise, Hayley actually ended up laughing at his words and even smiled. It was probably the first time she had smiled in a while and she missed the feeling. For that split second, she nearly forgot that she was unhappy. But once she was reminded of all the troubles leading up to that week, her smile faded and she was back to being the sad little girl.  
  
"I guess I couldn't cheer you up for long," Oli frowned. "Mind if I ask what's wrong?"  
  
If he had asked her that earlier, Hayley would have immediately said no and politely tell him to go away. That was only because she didn't want anybody to bother her and this guy happened to be the person to interrupt her brief period of serenity. Except he seemed nice and had even gotten her to smile. He sounded genuinely concerned for her and that really caught her attention, considering they had just met. There was something about him that made her feel like she could open up.  
  
She got up from the sidewalk and looked down at him. "Can we take a walk?"  
  
He nodded, got up, and they started moving. They walked in silence for a few minutes before Hayley took a deep breath and finally spoke up.  
  
"Look, I don't know how much you know about my band," she began. "But if you know a lot, then you should know that we've recently cancelled our latest tour."  
  
Oli just shook his head at this information. "I didn't know that. Why did you cancel it?"  
  
"Because of me," Hayley said. "For the past few months, things have gotten tense. The media's been only focusing on me without realizing that we're a whole  _band_  and the guys have been upset about this. Not only that, but I also ended a relationship with my boyfriend who's also in the band and that just added even  _more_  fuel to the flame. We've all been having arguments, things aren't the same, and it's gotten so bad that we couldn't even play  _shows_ anymore. So our big tour in Europe was cancelled and instead of being there, we're all back here at home. We're here to shoot some music video that just might be our last. I don't even know if we'll be able to film together because of all the mess I made. I'm so-"  
  
During her whole rant, she didn't even realize that she had raised her voice and started getting worked up. She became aware of this when Oli stood in front of her and placed both of his hands on her shoulders, causing her to stop rambling.  
  
"Relax," he said. "Just…breathe for a moment. Alright?"  
  
She did what he told her and relaxed her shoulders. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get so emotional there. You probably think I'm crazy."  
  
"No, you're not crazy," he assured her. "You're just really stressed out. To me, it sounds like you're being way too hard on yourself. It's not all your fault."  
  
"What do mean it's not all my fault?" she asked. "None of this would've happened if it weren't for me."  
  
"None of this would've happened if it wasn't for the  _media_ ," he retorted. "Did you want all the attention?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Are you trying to stop that from happening?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"And this boyfriend of yours. Why did you break up with him?"  
  
"It wasn't working out and it just wasn't good for the band."  
  
Finally, Oli let go of her and they walked further down the sidewalk. "You're thinking that you caused all of this when in reality, you're blaming yourself for things that aren't in your control. It's not your fault that the media's shitty and as for the guy, he's just dealing with the break up in his own way. You gotta stop beating yourself up and start believing in your band. You'll be fine."  
  
What he was saying actually made sense the more Hayley thought about it. She couldn't control how the public portrayed her and even though Josh was still upset over the break up, she couldn't expect him to act like it was okay. Hayley realized she was thinking too much about the negative to even give the positive a chance. She had already concluded that the music video would end in failure when it hadn't even happen yet. Instead of expecting failure, she shouldn't give up.  
  
"You're right," she agreed. "I love the guys and I care for them a lot. Even if things haven't been the best, I still want us to stay together. I gotta stop moping around and start believing that things will get better."  
  
She looked at Oli and her lips curled into a smile. Before he knew it, she pulled him into a hug, standing on the tip of her toes as she wrapped her arms around him. Oli was taken aback by this gesture, but he eventually grinned as well and reciprocated the hug. It wasn't even an awkward hug and he actually thought it was nice.  
  
"Thank you," she said. "I guess I really just needed someone to help set me straight."  
  
"Looks like I just happened to be at the right place," Oli said, still smiling at her.  
  
"What are you doing here anyway?" Hayley asked as she let go of him. "I mean, it's kind of random that you're here, of all places."  
  
"I'm on tour right now," he answered. "We're playing a show tomorrow night. Thought I'd go exploring."  
  
"At least you're on tour," she shrugged again, though she said this with a hint of humor in her voice.  
  
"Hey, you'll be back on tour before you know it," he told her.  
  
She didn't doubt his words. "Yeah. I will."  
  
Just then her phone rang and she took it out of her pocket to see who was calling. The caller ID read "Josh" and she guessed they all finally realized that she was gone. Knowing that it wasn't good to make them worry, she answered the call. "Hello?"  
  
"Hayley, where are you?" Josh asked. "We came to your house, only to find that you weren't home. Your mom didn't know where you went, so what's up? Where'd you go? Are you okay?"  
  
"Oh, I'm okay," Hayley replied. "I just took a drive downtown for a bit. I'm heading back soon, though."  
  
"Okay," he said. "We'll be here waiting."  
  
"Bye, Josh."  
  
"Bye."  
  
She hung up and then looked up at Oli. "I have to go. The band's waiting for me back at my place."  
  
"So soon?" Oli tried to hide his disappointment.  
  
"Yeah," she gave him an apologetic look. "But I'll be sure to keep in touch with you. Here, I'll give you my number."  
  
Her gave her his phone so she could add her number in his contacts while he did the same to her phone. Once they exchanged numbers, she gave him another hug.  
  
"Once again, thank you," she smiled again.  
  
Oli just nodded. "No problem. I hope things get better for your band."  
  
After what seemed like a while, she reluctantly let go of him and began walking back the way she came. He watched her and brought a hand up to wave. Seeing this, Hayley also waved and called out, "Good luck at your show tomorrow!"  
  
"Good luck filming your music video," he said back.  
  
"Take care."  
  
With that, she turned around and headed toward her car. Smiling to herself, she got into the vehicle and drove off. It was amazing how her entire mood had changed all because of a small conversation with this one guy who happened to approach her. She headed home with Oli on her mind, wondering if she'll ever see him again.

 

* * *

 

When Hayley arrived home, the guys were all in the living room and sitting on the couch. Her mother was also with them and when she came inside, they all got up and told her how relieved they were to see that she was alright.  
  
"You scared us, Hayles," Taylor pulled her into a hug.  
  
Jeremy was next to give her a hug. "Seriously, don't leave late at night without telling us."  
  
"I'm really sorry, guys," Hayley wrapped her arms around Jeremy and looked at everyone around her, guilty that she made them all freak out. "I didn't think you would all be worried."  
  
"Of _course_ we were worried," Zac said.  
  
Even Josh gave Hayley a hug. "We may have been going through a lot of crap lately, but that doesn't mean we don't care about you."  
  
"I know," she said. "I care about all of you, too. It's been a rough couple of weeks, but I really believe we can get through this."  
  
"I'm also sorry for how I've been acting," Josh apologized. "We shouldn't be pointing fingers just because of how stupid the media's been."  
  
Zac put a hand on his brother's shoulder. "Hey, it's apart of being a band. There's five different personalities, so you can't expect everything to be perfect. We've had a few fights, but I agree with Hayley. We'll get through this."  
  
"We're a family," Taylor put his arms around Jeremy and Zac. "We stick together."  
  
"No matter what," said Jeremy.  
  
They all smiled widely and got in a group hug. The guys pretty much surrounded Hayley and she was feeling the happiest she had ever been that entire month. The band wasn't perfect and they were going through a rough time, but it was apparent that things were definitely going to look up for them.  
  
Later that night after the guys had left, Hayley sat on her bed and looked up at the ceiling. She couldn't help but have Oli in her thoughts again. If it weren't him, she didn't think the night would have ended as well as it did. If he never talked to her, she would've still been hopeless about her situation and that would've caused even more damage to everyone. Hayley lay on her bed, making sure to remember to tell Oli that things worked out.  
  
She felt her eyelids grow heavy and finally closed them, only to hear her phone ringing again. Not wanting to open her eyes, she answered the phone without looking at the caller ID. It was probably one of the guys again.  
  
"Don't you think it's too late to be calling?" she joked.  
  
"I guess I'm still going by the UK's time zone."  
  
Her eyes snapped open and she sat up at hearing the familiar British accent on the other end. She no longer felt so tired anymore now that Oli had called her. "You're in the US now. Gotta get used to this time zone."  
  
"Were you sleeping?" he asked.  
  
"No, I wasn't," she said. "So what are you calling for?"  
  
"I just wanted to ask you something," he responded.  
  
"Okay, what is it?"  
  
The other end was silent for a few minutes and Hayley patiently sat there, waiting to see what this guy wanted to ask. She looked at her screen to make sure he was still on the line and his voice eventually came back.  
  
"Do you need anybody for your music video?"  
  
At first she was confused, but her grin returned when she realized what he actually meant. She didn't even hesitate to give him her answer.  
  
"As a matter of fact, I do."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you watch the "That's What You Get" video and look in the way back, you'll see Oli. I swear.
> 
> Haha, anyways, thought of this idea a month ago. Like all story ideas of mine that take forever to get posted, I had trouble figuring out how to start it. Well, here it is!
> 
> This is a prequel to Chopped Orange Locks. So why did I put this is a sequel? Because that's how I believe they should be read. This series is anachronic (meaning out of order) and will focus on different moments in Hayley and Oli's relationship.
> 
> Unlike my first story, this one will be a little bit more serious. Also, it will be longer and this is not the last chapter. So enjoy another fic about my favorite crack pairing and stay tuned for the next chapter. This turned out longer than I expected, which is great since I like long chapters.
> 
> Hope you liked it! Comments are appreciated. (:
> 
> -Aliya


	2. Surprises That Come in the Form of a Show and a Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> July 2009: Paramore stops by Cleveland during their tour with No Doubt.

**July 2009**

 

"Are we there yet?"  
  
"No. No. No. Taylor, you are  _not_  doing this again."  
  
It was a hot summer morning in July and thankfully the air conditioning in the bus was functioning properly because it would've only made the band sweat with irritation and they would've thrown Taylor off the bus due to him asking the dreaded road trip question. He had only asked it once that day, but Jeremy was giving him a warning already because nowadays that didn't have to be asked a million times for them to hate it.  
  
Paramore was on the road again. Their tour bus was driving through somewhere in the East and the band was in the back of the bus in their nice little "living room" area, complete with a U-shaped black leather couch. Taylor was laying down and rested his head on Hayley's lap while she gazed out the window, looking at the beautiful scenery that everyone else was missing. Jeremy was across from them browsing on his laptop while Josh and Zac were concentrated on playing video games and beating each other.  
  
"Again?" Taylor repeated. "But this is the first time I've said it."  
  
"Maybe for this trip," Jeremy rolled his eyes. "But you ask this every time we go on tour."  
  
"Well, I did you guys a favor," Taylor said. "You would've asked me why I didn't say it yet anyway."  
  
Hayley just looked at Jeremy and shrugged. "He's got a point, Jerm. I  _was_  just about to bring that up."  
  
"Don't encourage him."  
  
Josh paused the game he and his brother were playing and turned to Taylor. "And to answer your question: we all have absolutely no idea."  
  
"Seriously, every time you ask, we just give you the same answer," Zac chuckled and got up. "Anyway, I'm going to get myself a soda. Anybody else want one?"  
  
"Yeah, I'll come with you," Josh set his controller down and stood up. The two brothers then headed toward the front of the bus where the fridge was. Jeremy closed his laptop and followed suit, leaving Hayley and Taylor alone in the back.  
  
Since the weather was so humid, getting a cold and refreshing can of soda did sound good at the moment and Taylor wanted to join the guys and get one as well. Too bad he was in a much too comfortable position, meaning he was more lazy than he was thirsty. He sighed and Hayley looked down at him.  
  
"If it makes you feel better," she smiled. "I  _also_  wanted to know if we were there yet."  
  
He smiled back at her. "You wouldn't happen to have the answer, would you?"  
  
"Sadly, no," she laughed. "But I hope the answer's 'yes'."  
  
The ride had felt way too long and she was getting impatient. In fact, she had been restless ever since the bus started moving and she couldn't wait for them to reach their destination. Since nobody was providing an answer to what she and Taylor wanted to know, the window was the only way for her to find out. She would know once she saw a large outdoor amphitheater where many booths would be set up. Numerous buses would be parked near the venue and in a few hours, many people dressed in band tees, wearing shades and backpacks would gather around the amphitheater. All to see their favorite bands and enjoy the positive atmosphere. Paramore would finally be at the one event that always welcomed them with open arms.  
  
_Warped Tour._  Hayley held Warped Tour so dear to her heart because of the impact it had on the band when they first did the tour in 2005. There were so many bands that they looked up to that they ended up meeting and playing with. So many fans that they got to talk to, some new bands they met, all the fun things they did when they weren't performing. Despite moments where they were lugging their gear around just to get the stuff on the stage, the whole thing was such a great experience. They've relived this amazing experience for the past four years.  
  
They were touring with No Doubt at the moment, but since they found out that they were going to pass by Cleveland on their day off, which also happened to be the same day Warped was going to be there, they immediately decided to pay a visit and do a surprise show. After so much drama that happened in the previous year, they were back on track, recorded a new album, and were enjoying each other's company again. So far, 2009 was treating them good.  
  
"What are you looking forward to?" Taylor asked.  
  
"Everything," Hayley replied. "I just can't wait to see everyone's faces when we come out on stage. This is probably the best thing we could ever do on a day off."  
  
"Haha, they'll never know what hit 'em," he smirked. "You also excited to see  _him_?"  
  
"Him?" she was puzzled. "Who are you talking about?"  
  
"Wait, you didn't hear?" Taylor lifted his head off her lap and sat up next to her. "Bring Me the Horizon's on Warped Tour right now."  
  
Hayley's look of confusion quickly turned into a look of excitement. Her eyes lit up and she smiled at the news. It had been a year since the band had last seen Bring Me the Horizon and the thought of seeing them again made her even more anxious to get there. Ever since meeting Oli on the streets of Franklin, the two bands had become great friends. After helping Hayley feel better when she was going through a lot, she invited him and his band to hang out for the "That's What You Get" video. After all, their director told her to bring friends along and Oli had become her new friend. He thought it sounded fun and it killed some time before they had to head back for their show.  
  
They had gotten to know each other during that video shoot. Oli told her about his life when he was growing up in Sheffield and how the band started. She learned that he had a brother named Tom and that he even had a clothing line called Drop Dead. Hayley then told him that she actually came from Mississippi and she went on to tell the story of how she met Josh and Zac among other things. They both finally got to listen to each other's music and even though they were different genres, they enjoyed it. The 2008 Warped Tour was the last time they had seen each other and ever since, they've been keeping in contact with each other by texting and calling.  
  
"They're on Warped?" Hayley then punched Taylor's arm. "How do you even know that? The guys are actually going to be in the same place as us and you didn't even tell me?"  
  
Taylor rubbed his arm and leaned back slightly to avoid being hit again. "Okay, ouch, you punch hard for someone so small. And I know because Lee told me when I was texting him and I thought you  _already_  knew since you're on the phone with Oli nonstop. Don't punch me, please."  
  
"Ugh, but he didn't tell me  _that_ ," she ignored his protests and continued to punch him. "You should've told me anyway!"  
  
"Whatever, fine. Ow. I'll tell you next time. Ow. Okay, that's enough-"  
  
"You better!"  
  
"Ow. I will! Ow. Can you stop-  _OW._  Your punches actually hurt, Hayley!"  
  
Just then, Josh came to save the day and walked in to find Hayley using the other guitarist's arm as a punching bag while poor Taylor was trying all he could to shield himself from her fists. Josh just stood there, not sure if he should be amused or scared and cleared his throat to get their attenton. When they both noticed him, they stopped their playful (or not so playful in Taylor's case) fighting and went back to sitting normally.  
  
"I'm going to just choose not to comment on this," Josh raised an eyebrow. Though his face remained neutral, they both could tell in his eyes that he wanted to laugh. "But I came in here because I'm letting you guys know that I have good news and bad news."  
  
"Can the bad news be any worse than Hayley abusing me?" Taylor held his arm that was probably going to bruise later on in the day.  
  
Josh sighed. "Anyway…the bad news is that we're almost out of soda. The good news is that we're finally in Cleveland."  
  
The bad news made Hayley laugh while Taylor didn't quite find that as funny as she did ("There better be at least one left for me!"), but they didn't care about their beverage supply when they looked out the window and saw that they were no longer driving through grass fields. The bus was passing by buildings and when the Time Warner Cable Amphitheater came into view, it confirmed that they did in fact make it to Warped Tour.  
  
"We're finally here, Hayles," Taylor put his arm her and grinned. "You ready for this?"  
  
"Of course I am!" she rejoiced. "This day is going to be awesome."  
  
Eventually, the bus came to a stop and had parked near other tour buses. Outside, many musicians were already taking their equipment out and walking around. Jeremy and Zac had gotten out of the bus first and Josh was right behind them. Taylor and Hayley, however, didn't move. Hayley just glanced at him, wondering why he wasn't heading out yet.  
  
"If we're going to go out there," Taylor smirked again. "We need to make an entrance."  
  
She just giggled. "Got anything in mind?"  
  
"Piggyback?"  
  
"Why yes, I'd love that."  
  
Hayley jumped on Taylor's back and he held her legs. Once they were settled and made sure that neither of them would end up falling, he began walking forward and made his way out of the bus to join everyone else.

 

* * *

  
He didn't quite know why, but Oli had somehow made it a habit of walking around and checking the place out whenever they were in a new city. Maybe it was because he wasn't one to sit still or because he was fascinated by America, but either way he liked seeing all the different areas.  
  
Cleveland was the place he was exploring that day and he circled the amphitheater a few times as he held a bottle of water in his hand. The place was nice, he had to admit and he passed by all the booths that were in the process of being set up and he chatted with a few artists that were also walking around. It was another day at Warped, but he couldn't help but feel like it wasn't as exciting as it had been the previous year. Sure, he loved being on stage and how they've drawn a bigger crowd and all the new bands. They were fun, really. But to him, there was something—better yet,  _someone_ —missing and in the back of his head, he knew who was missing.  _Hayley_  was missing.  
  
Looking back at Warped Tour the year before, all he could remember was all the fun he had spending time with her. The both of them would always run around the venue, playing pranks on other bands and playing around when they weren't performing. Paramore's set was earlier in the day, so Bring Me the Horizon would be on the side of the stage to watch them. Later on, it would be Bring Me the Horizon's set and every time Oli looked to the right of the stage, she and the rest of her band would be there.  
  
He'd always mess with her when she was singing, mostly making faces at her to get her to laugh during her set. Yet that didn't phase her and she'd just flash him that wide grin of hers, showing off the little gap in her teeth before looking back at the crowd. During his set, she would mess with him by headbanging and dancing, which came close to distracting him at times, but never completely successful. Though inside, he was laughing and afterwards they'd meet back at his bus where he would tell her how silly she looked while she teased him about his funny faces.  
  
It occurred to him that he spent time with her more than anybody else and because Paramore wasn't on the 2009 lineup, Oli noticed how different it was without her. That wasn't to say he didn't like the tour, just that he sort of wished she was there since it had been months since they've met up. Obviously, that was expected to happen when it came to forming a close friendship with a girl who lived halfway around the world from him coupled with the fact that they were in well-known bands that traveled all over the place. Their "long-distance friendship" was pretty impressive.  
  
After what seemed like the fiftieth time he went around the venue, he heard Lee's voice in the distance. "Hey, Oli!"  
  
He turned around to face Lee, who was coming toward him and waved. "Hey. What's up?"  
  
"We've been looking all over for you," Lee told him, his voice sounding urgent. "We need you to come back to the bus right now."  
  
"What do you need me for?" Oli asked.  
  
"There's a new band that just got here," Lee informed him. "And let's just say they are talking an awful lot of shit to us."  
  
Oli frowned and rolled his eyes. "Well, that's not new. You want me to go back why, exactly?"  
  
"Because they're not just talking shit," Lee explained. "They started a fight and are trying to wreck our bus and equipment!"  
  
"What the fuck?" Oli tightened his fist. "What are we standing here for? Come on, let's head over there!"  
  
He dropped the water bottle and immediately started running back to the bus, not even bothering to let Lee catch up to him. Before he knew it, he made it back, only to stare in confusion at the sight in front of him.  
  
Like Lee said, another band had arrived, but they most definitely weren't new nor were they even  _attempting_  to ruin the equipment. There was zero conflict going on and it became clear that while this band was interacting with his band, the way they were interacting consisted of all of them conversing and laughing. They were even hugging each other.  
  
When he got a better view of their faces, Oli rubbed his eyes to make sure if his vision was correct. He recognized who this band was, but wasn't quite ready to believe what he was seeing. In the midst of the small group of people, one particular face caught his eye. They were talking to Matt, excitement visibly on their face as their green eyes lit up each time they laughed. All the while, their long fiery orange hair was blowing in the summer breeze.  
  
Oli's eyes went wide and he didn't budge. As he looked at this person, he felt a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. Soon enough, he was grinning widely and there was only one thought that crossed his mind once he was aware of everything.  
  
_Lee, you fucking liar._  
  
He ignored Lee, who couldn't stop laughing next to him, and finally took a few steps forward to get closer to where everyone was. With the smile still on his face, he spoke loud and clear so he could acknowledge that he was there.  
  
"I know that orange hair anywhere."  
  
Everyone stopped to look at Oli and welcomed his presence with smiles. Though the one person he was specifically addressing had a bigger smile than everyone else. As if their eyes weren't already lit enough, they were practically shining when they saw him.  
  
"Having a reunion without me, Hayley?" he stopped walking and held his arms out wide. That gesture gave her the cue to run toward him.  
  
"Oli!" she threw her arms around him, to which he hugged her tightly and spun her around. it suddenly hit him that he was equally excited.  
  
He stopped spinning her, yet the both of them didn't let go. "I can't believe you're here. I thought you were touring with No Doubt."  
  
"We are, but we have the day off today and we're taking advantage of it by playing here," she said. "I didn't even know you guys were here because  _someone_  didn't tell me."  
  
"It's not  _my_  fault  _you_  didn't bother to ask!" Taylor pointed out.  
  
Oli looked up at the guys and let go of Hayley. "Hey, Taylor.  
  
"Nice to see you again," Taylor gave him a quick hug.  
  
Josh then walked up to Oli. "Long time no see."  
  
"Seriously," Oli chuckled. "Has it really been a year since we've all seen each other?"  
  
"Yep, it has," Zac nodded and turned to Matt. "So how have you guys been?"  
  
"We've been good," Matt replied. "Just been enjoying Warped for, what, three weeks now? Yeah, it's been fun so far. What about you?"  
  
"We've been doing good also," Josh said. "Been touring with No Doubt and a few other artists since May. We're heading to Indiana tomorrow."  
  
"Looks like we won't be able to hang out for long," Oli sighed as he looked back at Hayley.  
  
"Aw, don't think like that," Hayley patted his shoulder. "It's only the morning. We still got the whole day. What time is your guys' set?"  
  
"It's at 12:30," said Lee. "We'll be on the Hurley Stage."  
  
"And you know we'll be there to watch you guys," she grinned. "I'm looking forward to it."  
  
"I'll make sure to catch you headbanging," Oli joked. "Okay, we've got a few hours to kill. Why don't we all hang out?"  
  
"I'd like that," Hayley agreed. "We've got some catching up to do."

 

 

* * *

  
An hour or so had passed and Oli was back to circling the amphitheater. Only this time, Hayley was also walking with him and the two had been giving each another an update on their lives. Even with technology giving them the gift of cell phones, there was only so much they could say through calls.  
  
"Did I ever tell you I like your new album?"  
  
"I think so. I can't remember."  
  
"Well, I like it."  
  
The area was filled with people, all the booths were set up, and bands had already started playing. After an hour of being cramped with everyone on Bring Me the Horizon's bus, Oli and Hayley had decided they needed some air and left the group to see how things were outside. Though they didn't want to be noticed by people just yet, especially since not many knew that Paramore was going to be there. They did their best to keep a good distance away from the venue to avoid the crowd and it appeared to be working because nobody ran up to them.  
  
"What's your favorite song from it?" he asked.  
  
Hayley stopped for a moment to think. "I'd have to say 'Suicide Season' is my favorite. I know people probably tell you this a lot, but I loved it. The lyrics, the melody, your voice. There was so much emotion in that song and it was all beautiful and sad at the same time."  
  
"So you like that song, huh?" Oli looked away from her, thinking back at when he first started writing the lyrics of that track and the events that inspired those words to come out. "That's a very personal song to me."  
  
"What's the story behind it?" she inquired. She noticed that he was frowning, which made her feel that she shouldn't be too nosy. "If it's a touchy subject, you don't have to say anything…"  
  
"No, it's okay," Oli shook his head. They were good enough friends for him to tell her this and even when they met, she was actually comfortable enough to open up to him about what she was going through. Both of them were fine with telling each other personal stuff in the past and this was no different. Hayley was one of the people he could really talk to; even over the phone.  
  
"I wrote that song for a friend," he said. "His dad died and after that happened, he was never the same. He was distant and became cold, resentful even. It's like once his dad died, so did a part of him and I wished I could do anything to make him feel okay again. He was like a completely different person and as days passed, he got even angrier and…and we don't even talk anymore."  
  
The meaning of the song made much more sense after hearing Oli's story and Hayley's only response to this was to comfort him with a hug. When it came to her hugs, he couldn't help but wrap his arms around her as well.  
  
"I'm sorry about your friend," she empathized. "I lost a friend once, too."  
  
"Sorry for making things depressing," Oli said. "I'm glad to at least have  _you_  as friend."  
  
She looked up at him and smiled. "I'm glad you're my friend, too. Now that's enough being sad. Here, I'll cheer you up."  
  
Hayley grabbed his arm and started leading him back to the buses. Oli's smile returned at seeing how she instantly became happy again. Another thing he remembered when it came to touring with her was that she always made it impossible to stay upset.  
  
"What are you gonna do?"  
  
"You'll see."  
  
He didn't say anything after that and only laughed as she brought him onto Paramore's bus, wondering what exactly she had in store for him in there. Whatever it was going to be, he wasn't going to deny that it would brighten his mood.  
  
She  _was_  Hayley Williams, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> …Okay, maybe this story isn't all that serious as I thought it would be.
> 
> Took my time with this chapter. Sorry to keep you guys waiting. Well, if anyone's reading this anyway.
> 
> It's been a while since I've written these two bands interacting with each other, so I hope I did okay. I'm at least satisfied with how I wrote Hayley and Taylor's relationship because they're such buddies. And Lee messing with Oli was also fun to write. Bwahaha.
> 
> Thanks to anyone that's reading this! Comments are very appreciated. (:
> 
> -Aliya


	3. You're Pushing and Pulling Me Down to You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I should've never thought of you."

It had become some sort of unspoken agreement that if everyone wanted to hang out, get drunk, or do all kinds of interesting things, they would all go to Bring Me the Horizon's bus while Paramore's bus remained empty. That was what made Hayley and Oli have their very own agreement that if they wanted it to be just the two of them, they would leave and head to her bus.  
  
Only one other person would go in there, that one person being Taylor. Except, he didn't stay long and the only thing he cared about was if his precious soda was still in the fridge. He'd walk in, grab a can, and then jokingly tell them not to touch his stuff as he left. The only possession he actually allowed Hayley to lay her hands on was his acoustic guitar because he trusted her with it and because sometimes either he or Josh would play some songs with her in their free time and let her use their instruments. Most people usually forgot the fact that Hayley herself played guitar as well. Sure, she didn't consider herself as amazing as Josh or Taylor, but she could still play pretty good.  
  
After bringing Oli onto the bus, she led him to the back so she could get Taylor's guitar. Sometimes he would leave it in his bunk, but she remembered that earlier that morning he was practicing some songs from their setlist when they were all on the couch. Josh had been practicing, too, but when she got back there, she saw that his was gone. He was probably using it to entertain the others, which made her giggle as she pictured what he could possibly be playing for everybody.  
  
Once she got Taylor's case, she opened it and took out the guitar and grinned at Oli. He took a seat and waited patiently as she got the guitar pick Josh gave her from her bag and smiled when she finally sat down next to him with the guitar in her lap.  
  
"So this is what you're doing? Serenading me?" Oli teased. "I'm flattered to be getting my own private concert."  
  
Hayley laughed and gave him a light shove. "Oh, shut up. Don't make me change my mind."  
  
"Okay, okay, I'll keep quiet," he chuckled. "So, what are you singing?"  
  
"Well, I'm going to sing you a personal song of my own that not many people have heard yet," she told him. "I'm gonna sing you one of the songs from our newest album. Like, it's kinda sad, but also happy at the same time. It'll make sense, trust me."  
  
"New music, eh?" he leaned in closer, giving her his full attention. "Since you hung up on me all those times because you said you were recording, this better be good."  
  
"I could still change my mind."  
  
"I'm kidding! Okay, I'm ready to listen."  
  
Rolling her eyes and smirking at him, she tucked her hair behind her ear and began tuning the guitar. "You gotta be easy on me if I mess up. Alright, here it goes…"  
  
She took a deep breath and started strumming the guitar. Three simple chords was what she mostly had to play throughout the song and she was doing okay so far. Unlike most of the songs from her that Oli heard, this was a slow one. Her face was relaxed as she continued to strum and he already was liking how it sounded. Still, all he really wanted to hear was her voice. As if she was reading his mind, Hayley opened her mouth and finally sang.  
  
_When I was younger, I saw my daddy cry and curse at the wind.  
He broke his own heart and I watched as he tried to reassemble it._  
  
Her voice was serene and soothing. Just in that first line, he could already hear the emotions she was conveying. Oli listened to the words that escaped from her lips, which  _did_  sound sad due to the apparent message in the first verse.  
  
_And my momma swore that she would never let herself forget.  
And that was the day that I promised I'd never sing of love if it does not exist._  
  
Since she had stated that it was a personal song, Oli wondered if this was how she really felt and was close to questioning her about it. Only he couldn't interrupt her. Not when she sang with such a smooth and mesmerizing voice.  
  
_But darling, you are the only exception._  
  
As she sang those lyrics, Oli found it harder to look away and it was like he was in some sort of trance. She'd meet his eyes with hers while trying her best to keep her strumming in a steady tempo, but he didn't seem to notice if she had messed up or not. He only focused on her perfect heart-shaped face, looking into those piercing green eyes while her bright orange hair fell over her shoulders. His eyes traveled down and he then stared at her glossy pink lips that appeared to look softer than ever as her soulful vocals went on.  
  
But he snapped out of it when he heard what sounded like Hayley hitting the wrong chord, which made her put the song to a halt. He blinked a few times while she just looked at him sheepishly.  
  
"Sorry, I screwed up on the bridge," she said and let out an irritated sigh. "That's when the chords change and I  _almost_  had it."  
  
Oli laughed a bit at her little moment of frustration, but also couldn't help but be disappointed that the song had to end so abruptly. He wanted to hear the rest of it. He wanted to hear her sing more.  
  
"It's a beautiful song," he admitted.  
  
She smiled at the compliment. "Thank you."  
  
"Did you write this song for him?" Oli asked.  
  
"You mean Josh?" Hayley tilted her head, raising an eyebrow. "Well, we wrote it together and for me, I like to think that it could be for him, but at the same time, I also know it's not. When I was little, my parents divorced and that did kind of make me give up on love, but I realized that there  _could_  be that one person that's worth taking a chance. It isn't Josh. To be honest, I don't really know who I wrote this song for, but it still means a lot to me. Whoever they could be…I hope they're out there."  
  
Oli opened his mouth, but closed it again and bit his lip. He had decided against asking her the questions he had and instead looked back at the guitar.  
  
"Can I hear the rest of the song?"  
  
Her face brightened and she held the instrument on her lap again. "Of course."  
  
And just like that, she was back to playing music for him. She picked up where she left off, playing different chords for the bridge and she had a brief look of accomplishment when she noticed that she didn't mess up again. These chords were higher and he anticipated her voice to do the same.  
  
_I've got a tight grip on reality, but I can't let go of what's in front of me here._  
  
He was still caught off guard when her voice raised, even though he expected it. Every time her voice went like that, he always reacted like he was hearing it for the first time. Just how can she do that? She had so much emotion, she sounded so  _amazing_ , and Oli sat there in awe, taking in the beauty of it all.  
  
_I know you're leaving in the morning when you wake up. Leave me with some kind of proof it's not a dream._  
  
She stared straight at him after that line and he found himself staring at those lips of hers again. For some reason, he couldn't take his eyes off her lips, especially when they smiled. Hayley changed chords and sang about that treasured "only exception", repeating that line over and over again. It no longer felt like she was just singing. Oli felt as if she was  _telling_ him this and as he immersed himself into her voice, he started leaning in forward.  
  
Hayley noticed how he was getting closer, but she didn't stop singing. Before she was really certain of what she was doing, she slowly began to lean toward him, too. As the song was coming to an end, their faces were close. Awfully close. The only thing that was keeping them from getting any closer was the guitar.  
  
_And I'm on my way to believing…_  
  
Neither of them moved or blinked when she sang the last line. They looked at each other in silence until Oli couldn't take it anymore. He reached out, took the guitar out of her hands, and gently put it aside. As soon as that was out of the way, he crashed his lips into hers and wrapped his arms around her waist. Hayley's eyes widened then immediately slid closed as she began to kiss him back. She pulled him close and tangled her fingers in his hair, Oli's heart racing when he realized that she wasn't pulling away.  
  
Because of this unexpected move, it hit her that maybe all this time, she had always felt this way about him. All those times she enjoyed being with Oli and how much she missed him. Maybe being with him had always been what she wanted. To be with Oli made her smile against his lips, picturing how things would be to have a relationship with him.  
  
But she also thought of the media and that changed everything.  
  
What would  _really_  happen if they got together? She was already aware of the consequences of dating a band member. All that stupid focus on Hayley, only referring to Josh as her "arm candy" that horribly resulted in cancellation of tour dates, fights, and nearly jeopardized the band's future. If it was already that bad for her band, what could happen if Oli got involved in the shitstorm of gossip that surrounded her?  
  
She didn't want him to be known as "Hayley's boyfriend" when he was so much more than that. Already, she could imagine his band going through problems because of her, going through the same shit Paramore did. It was painful enough for her own band to deal with this; she couldn't make another band fall apart, too. People would get hurt.  _Oli_  would get hurt.  
  
She broke away from the kiss and shook her head. "No."  
  
Oli was confused by the harshness in her voice. "What's wrong?"  
  
"I can't do this. Not again."  
  
"Hayley, what do you mean-"  
  
"You need to leave."  
  
"Please..."  
  
"I  _can't_  do this," she said again. She turned away from him and buried her face in her hands, wanting to scream at the top of her lungs. She probably would have if it weren't for Taylor's voice to make her look up.  
  
"Hayles? Oli?" Taylor poked his head into the bus and started walked toward the back. "Oh, there you guys are."  
  
"Yeah, we were just hanging out back here," Hayley mumbled. She forced a smile and Oli , still confused by what was going on, just stared at the guitar that had been put beside him.  
  
"Ah, I see you're playing with the guitar," Taylor nodded and picked it up. "That's actually why I came in here. Josh has his guitar and he wanted you and me to join his jam session or whatever."  
  
"Jam session?" said Hayley.  
  
Taylor shrugged. "His words, not mine. What about you, Oli? Wanna join us?"  
  
"Uh, I think I should be going back to my bus to get ready for the show," Oli scratched his head and stood up. "I'll catch up with you all later."  
  
"See you later, then."  
  
"Later," he walked out and didn't bother to look back. His mind was preoccupied with the whole scene of him kissing Hayley, more so by the aftermath of it. What just happened back there? Everything was going so well up until that point. He needed time to himself to sort his thoughts out.  
  
When he had left, Hayley also didn't bother to watch him leave. Taylor had apparently caught on to how uneasy she looked because he sat down and rested his head on her shoulder. "What's up with you? You don't look so good."  
  
"I'm fine," she assured him. It was a false statement and Taylor probably doubted she really was okay, but he knew her enough not to push it. At the moment, she wasn't in the mood to tell him about it just yet, but she was going to bring it up to him eventually. "You said Josh wanted us, right? Don't want to keep him waiting."  
  
They made their way out the bus, Hayley leaning against Taylor while he had his arm around her. He didn't say anything else to her, only sensing that she needed his arm around her for comfort. She also needed to clear her head and Josh couldn't have picked a better time to call her to sing. She wanted nothing more than that. That was always the best remedy for her.

 

* * *

 

 

 

  
Locking himself up in the bathroom of the tour bus was not where Oli wanted to be an hour before Bring Me the Horizon's set. Though that was about the only area he could be alone and the only part of the bus where all other noises were almost nonexistent. He still heard the sounds, but he preferred to hear muffled voices over obnoxious laughter ringing in his ear. If he was going to sort out his thoughts, he didn't need the guys distracting him.  
  
It was driving him crazy to no end trying to figure out why Hayley had a sudden change of attitude. One moment, he was holding her close, relishing the kiss that she had happily reciprocated. The next moment, she pulled away and acted cold, brushing him off. What was supposed to be something amazing turned into something extremely awkward for the both of them. Did he do something wrong? What exactly did he do?  
  
He began to wonder if she even felt the same way at all. Hearing Hayley sing with that voice of hers while her eyes locked with his just to cheer him up was what finally pushed him to stop hiding his repressed feelings. For a long time, he wanted to be with her and only her. In that moment, he knew he had to let her know. Oli liked Hayley a lot and he had never been so certain about anybody else. When their lips met, he knew that she was the one person worth taking a chance for. Feeling her arms around him, he believed that she was telling him that he was worth it, too. And only seconds later, all those things disappeared when she stopped kissing him back and said those dreaded words:  _“I can’t do this.”_  
  
Oli closed his eyes in an attempt to tune things out, which failed to work and only made those muffled voices seem louder. He placed his hands over his ears and tried to think of something else besides her, which was slightly more successful than just shutting his eyes. He was so close to finally relaxing, only to be interrupted by the sound of a fist knocking on the door.  
  
"Oli? You okay in there?"  
  
Lee's voice. Oli was  _not_  in the mood to talk to anyone. "Go away, I'm busy."  
  
"You've been in there for a while," Lee sighed. "Is something bothering you? Come on, open up."  
  
He proceeded his knocking and made it louder each time he hit the door, which made it impossible for Oli to ignore. Gaining a headache from the constant pounding, Oli let out a groan and swung the door open, which would've given Lee a bloody nose if he hadn't backed away in time.  
  
"There, I opened it," Oli scowled. "Happy now?"  
  
Lee frowned. "Seriously, what's your problem? You were all happy earlier before you came back to the bus and now you look like you're having the worst day ever."  
  
Oli walked past him and sat on the couch. "Let's just say things aren't going so good with…"  
  
He didn't finish that sentence and cursed under his breath for almost mentioning her.  
  
"Good with what?" Lee walked over to the couch to sit next to him. "With Hayley? Did something happen between you two?"  
  
Oli winced at her name. Really? He couldn't even hear her name without feeling a pang in his stomach? There was also Lee's question. He already had the answer to it. Yes, something did in fact happen with Hayley. He kissed her, she kissed him back, but then she pushed him away and he had no idea what was going to happen from then on because girls were so damn confusing and complicated. Either that or he did something wrong—whatever the hell it was. Oli didn't want to tell all of that to him.  
  
And yet, he was going to anyway. Maybe not in that way because that was just his emotions and insecurities getting the better of him, but he wasn't going to hide this from a good friend. It would be better if he at least told someone because it wasn't healthy for him to hold in something like that, especially since it was troubling him.  
  
"I can't believe I'm telling you this," Oli began. "But yes, something happened between us. I kissed her."  
  
Like how any normal person would react to this reveal, Lee's jaw dropped and he sat there with a look of astonishment. There were a lot of different things he could've said, but since he was still trying to process the information, he could only sum up his feelings in one word. "Oh."  
  
He then tried to utter a sentence. "Wow. That's…that  _is_  something."  
  
Whether he meant it in a good or bad way, Oli couldn't quite distinguish that. "And she actually kissed me back, but then she just… _stopped_."  
  
"Did she have a reason why?" Lee asked.  
  
"All she told me was that she 'can't do this'," Oli said. "I don't know what she means by that."  
  
"Maybe you should try talking to her."  
  
Oli was about to say something in response to that, only to lose his train of thought when he heard noises coming from outside. He shut his mouth and turned his head toward the open door of the bus, listening closely to what these sounds could be. These so-called noises turned out to be the strumming of guitars. He was hearing music. There was another sound, too. This particular sound made him stand up from the couch, leave Lee behind, and make his way out to follow where it was coming from. Despite the sound being faint, he also found it familiar and he wanted to reach to wherever it was.  
  
He didn't have to walk that far by the time he found the source, which turned out to be people sitting on several camper chairs. It wasn't just anybody sitting on these chairs, which made sense as to why Oli was there. On the chairs were Taylor and Josh playing their guitars while Matt Kean and Matt Nicholls was sitting near them. In the middle of them all was Hayley singing.  
  
The sound he had followed was her voice.  
  
When everyone saw that he was there, the guys greeted him and smiled. Hayley was even looking at him and surprisingly kept her composure, making Oli wonder how the hell she could still sing because he was having trouble just standing at the moment. His knees started feeling weak and thankfully Matt offered him a seat because he was close to hitting the pavement. He kept his eyes on her as he sat down, trying to listen to what she was singing. It wasn't the song she had sung earlier, which he knew he wouldn't have been able to handle a second time for obvious reasons. Instead, it was a song that he had actually heard before a while ago.  
  
_Now when I caught myself, I had to stop myself.  
I'm saying something that I should've never thought._  
  
A few months back, she had told him that Paramore recorded two songs for the movie soundtrack for  _Twilight_  and he made a promise to her that he would listen to them, even though he wasn't a big fan of the movie. One of the songs was called "Decode", which was the first single released for the movie. It gained so much popularity that not many people cared to listen to the other song, which Oli liked better in his own honest opinion. This was the song that she was singing. Before, he only associated the lyrics with the movie and nothing else. Hearing the words again, he felt another pang in his stomach once he understood why she decided to sing this.  
  
_Don't know what I want.  
But I know in my heart it's not you._  
  
She was looking at him again and he tightly gripped the chair, trying to remain calm. But seriously, how was he to remain calm when the girl he had feelings for was singing this song  _for him?_  He couldn't escape her voice. When she sang these verses and the chorus, she sounded so conflicted, so tragic, and it hurt him. The words stabbed him like a goddamn knife and he didn't care how overused that figure of speech was. The worst part was that he still didn't know why she was even doing this. Why had she pushed him away? Why didn't she want to be with him?  _Why?_  
  
He had to talk to her.

 

 

* * *

 

Oli managed to catch her leaning against the bus after she was done with her "jam session". When he walked up to her, she sighed and anticipated that he probably had a lot of questions to ask. Maybe it would've been better if she hid in her bunk.  
  
"Hi," she murmured.  
  
"Can we talk?" he asked. Before she could reply, he took her hand and led her around the bus so they could be in a place where nobody could interrupt them. She looked up at him and folded her arms across her chest.  
  
"Your set's in twenty minutes," she reminded him. "Shouldn't you be-"  
  
"This is more important," he said. "This is about us."  
  
"Us?" she frowned.  
  
“I can’t stop thinking about that kiss we had,” Oli told her. “To be honest, I liked kissing you and I know you’re not going to admit it, but you liked it, too. I...I really want to be with you, Hayley. I really thought that was what you also wanted, but you apparently don’t.”  
  
"Oli," she lifted a hand and cupped his cheek. "I really want to be with you, too. I really do."  
  
He placed his hand over hers. "Then what did you mean when you said you can't do this?"  
  
"Because don't you see what would happen?" she said. "I dated Josh and that affected the band in the worst possible way. I don't want to mess things up with you and your band, too. You don't deserve to get dragged in all this stupid publicity that I can't get away from. That's why Josh and I fell apart and I don't want you to get hurt."  
  
"No, you shouldn't be thinking like that," Oli took her hand away from his face so he could could hold it in his. "Remember what I said when we met? It's not your fault the media's full of shit because they're not in your control, remember?"  
  
"I might not be in control of what they do," Hayley moved closer to him. "But I have control over what  _I_  do and what I'm doing is preventing this from happening again. I'm sorry, Oli. I can't do this."  
  
He grimaced at her words, hating that last sentence more and more each time he heard it. She tried to walk away from him, but he didn't want to let her go. "Please, just…we can  _try_. Didn't you tell me that it's possible that there's someone out there for you that's worth taking a chance for?"  
  
She started loosening her grip on him. "That was before I really thought about the reality of it all."  
  
"Hayley, no…"  
  
No other words could come out of his mouth. Her hand slowly slipped out of his hold and she walked away from him and didn't dare look back. He stood there all alone and watched her leave until she went back around the bus and was no longer in sight. As soon as she was gone, his thoughts once again were filled with images of her. Images of the girl he couldn't have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided to start the month of December off with this. I finished this in three days and am very excited that I finally wrote it!
> 
> I feel like I made this chapter like a soap opera…
> 
> But I'm proud of how it turned out and hope you all enjoyed reading it! Really worked hard on this one. Please tell me what you think! It would mean a lot to me and I really appreciate feedback. (:


	4. But Now I Know What I Want

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "…And I know that it's you."

She was at the show.  
  
After reuniting with him a year since they've last met up with each other. After jumping into his arms while she rejoiced how great it was to be seeing him again. After spending most of the morning by his side and comforting him when he told her something personal. After taking him onto the bus to cheer him up with a new song of hers. After she practically hypnotized him with her voice and guitar. After meeting his lips and wrapping her arms around his neck, making him unable to think straight. After bringing the kiss to an end and telling him to leave without explaining why. After using a song to give him the message that she hated herself for feeling the way she felt. After telling him that she couldn't do it.  
  
After all  _that_ , Hayley still showed up and Oli had tried his hardest not to look in her direction again. He'd rather fall off the stage and have nobody catch him than see her standing on the side of the stage watching him perform.  
  
He wondered why she had bothered to make the effort to come when they both knew they couldn't look at each other the same way anymore. And yet, she always kept her promises and a year ago she had promised him she'd always be watching his set. No matter how distressed she was, she stayed true to her word and all Oli could think was how he probably wouldn't have been able to do the same thing. That thought made him feel even worse. This was way too much for him to handle in one day.  
  
Before he was aware of her presence, he thought he was okay. At least, that's what he kept telling himself. He convinced himself to agree with Hayley's reasons, even going so far to make some sort of mantra in his mind.  
  
 _Things are better this way,_  he repeated silently.  _For the sake of the band. Things are better this way._  
  
Keeping that in mind, he was going to make this show the best show that the fans would never forget. With the microphone in his hands, he put all his energy into his performance. His growls and screams ranged farther than ever and the crowd was enjoying it. This got him excited as well and once the first song was finished, he felt like he was weightless.  
  
Then he turned his head and saw her. And just like that, he was once again pulled into a downward spiral.  
  
She wasn't as bubbly and giddy like she always was during his shows. There was no dancing or headbanging. Hayley just stood there, her whole body like a statue. Her arms were crossed and her expression was blank, those green eyes of her completely unreadable. Even with her like this, he was the most distracted he'd ever been. He avoided making eye contact with her and fought the urge to turn his head toward her.  
  
"I will not let her get to me," Oli said to himself through clenched teeth.  
  
He took a deep breath and was once again moving around the stage and back to giving all his attention to the audience. He had to let her know—let  _himself_  know—that he was okay and nothing could stop him from giving the crowd what they came for. Even though it hurt like no other for him to know that she didn't want to be with him, that mostly motivated him to put on the best fucking show ever. He had to stop thinking about her and just move on. He had to let her go. This was his way of giving her the message and letting her know.  
  
 _Things are better this way._  
  
After finishing the last song, the crowd went wild. If everyone had to agree on something, they'd all agree that the show was definitely worth it and Oli raised his hands in the air as they all chanted the band's name. Without thinking, he turned his head to the left again where she was, only to find that nobody was standing there anymore. He couldn't help but frown. For some reason, he had wanted her to be there with her arms still crossed, only a smile would be on her face. A smile that said she wasn't going to go anywhere anytime soon. Looking at the empty space where she once stood as the crowd began to disperse, he lowered his arms and dropped the mic.  
  
He couldn't let her go. He couldn't ever let her go.

 

 

 

* * *

  
Taylor had been running around, going from booth to booth, and made his way through the sea of bodies that surrounded the amphitheater. He was getting tired of going all over the place, but he didn't want to stop. A few of his fellow musicians had wanted to talk to him, but talking was not on his agenda at the moment. The only conversation he would have with anyone was nothing more than a simple question, to which everyone's response was always "no". All he could worry about was where his friend could be and so far, he had not spotted the fiery head of hair anywhere.  
  
During Bring Me the Horizon's set, Hayley had ran off and Taylor had went after her. Apparently she proved to be faster than him because the moment he stepped off the stage to get her, she was already gone. Something was obviously bothering her; that much he knew. At this point, he couldn't just stand around and give her space any longer. Ever since he had walked in on Hayley and Oli, he was certain that new problems had come and he suspected that it had to do with whatever happened on the bus before he got there. From the look in their eyes to how quiet they had spoken, not to mention Oli wanting to get out of there quickly while Hayley acted as if she was going to be sick.  
  
If they weren't so subtle then, they definitely confirmed his suspicions when she practically sang that one song to Oli during their acoustic set with Josh. When Oli came to sit down with all of them, both of them were gazing at each other and the desperation and emotion in her voice grew. Taylor looked at the others to see if anyone else had noticed anything, but he turned out to be the only one that saw it.  
  
He stopped running to catch his breath, then cursed to himself. What other place around there could Hayley have gone to?  
  
And then once he started using his brain, he smacked his forehead for not thinking of the one place he should've checked first: her bunk.  
  
Taylor felt so stupid, though that was the least of his worries as he ran back to the bus. When he got inside, he called out for her. "Hayley?"  
  
No answer.  
  
He started walking toward the back. "C'mon, at least say something."  
  
Still no answer.  
  
Reaching the bunk area, he sighed when he noticed that her bunk was the only one that had the curtain closed. "Hayles, I know you're in here."  
  
Not waiting to see if she would answer or not, he went closer to her bunk and pushed the curtain aside. Sure enough, she was laying in it. She was curled up into a fetal position and her eyes were shut tight. Taylor hated to see her like this, remembering the last time she was in this position. When she had broken up with Josh, this was exactly how she looked when he went to comfort her at her house. This was yet another sign that told him something was wrong. Eventually, she opened her eyes and looked up at Taylor, sadness clearly all over her face.  
  
"Hey, Taylor," she gave him a half-smile, though it mixed with her pained expression. "I guess you found me."  
  
"Hayles," he said. "I gave you some space and I've been very patient, but I can't just do nothing anymore. Not when you're like  _this_. Now can you please tell me what's wrong?"  
  
Her smile was replaced with a frown. "I can't right now."  
  
Taylor wasn't having any of it. "That's it, I'm getting in there."  
  
"Wait, you are  _not_ -"  
  
"I'm getting in. Scoot over."  
  
He bent down and reached into her bunk to straighten her legs. When there was a little bit of an open space, he got into the bunk and Hayley had no choice but to shift her body into a more comfortable position so the both of them could lay in it. With Taylor laying beside her and the two of them facing each other, she knew there was no way out of this.  
  
"Why are you doing this to me?" she sighed.  
  
"Because as your friend who will always be there for you, I have a right to know what's bothering you," he said. "You can tell me anything, Hayley. No matter what you tell me, I'm not going to judge you or hate you or anything."  
  
"You promise you won't?"  
  
"Have I  _ever_  really judged you or hated you?"  
  
That was when Hayley pouted in defeat. Taylor wasn't that kind of person and she knew that. At her worst, he was always so understanding and to see how concerned he was made her feel bad for not telling him earlier. "No…you haven't."  
  
"Then tell me what's up," he put his head on her shoulder again and though she rolled her eyes at this, she liked it and it made her feel a little better.  
  
"I kissed Oli," she finally said. "It was right before you came on the bus. I sang to him and played your guitar and everything. But then I no longer was thinking about the song and I couldn't stop looking at him. He was moving closer to me and I also started leaning in and before I knew it, we kissed. And it was an  _amazing_  kiss. The moment his lips were against mine, it was like everything else but him existed. Like, all I could think about was how much I like him and how I could really see myself being with him..."  
  
Taylor just listened and nodded, surprisingly not reacting to this news the way she had expected him to. Needless to say, he knew her all too well and had seen this coming for a while. Whenever she was with Oli, he saw her eyes shine and how Oli couldn't stop smiling at her. Then here she was, describing to Taylor how the kiss with him felt and Taylor had never heard her talk like that in such a tone of voice since she was with Josh. When she said she liked Oli, Taylor knew she meant it.  
  
"Hold on a minute," he turned his head to face her with furrowed brows. "If you liked the kiss and you want to be with him, then why do you look so upset? Did he do something after that? Did he hurt you? He hurt you, didn't he? Because if he touched you, then he is dead-"  
  
Hayley clamped a hand over his mouth. "No! He didn't do anything. The only person that you have to worry about hurting anyone is  _me_."  
  
Taylor moved her hand away and looked even more confused. "What? I don't get what you're trying to say."  
  
"I can't be with him," her voice nearly broke when she said that. "That's what I'm trying to say. As much as I want to, it would only end up bad for the both of us. Look what happened with the media and Josh. I know you were just a touring member back then, but you were still around to see how the band almost broke up. You saw how hurt Josh was and how it took us a while to get back to normal. This was only between  _our_  band. If the public knew about me and Oli, then his band would be affected, too. That would be an even bigger mess and I don't want to pull him into all of that. I don't want to pull  _anyone_  into that."  
  
She was blaming herself. That's all Taylor could think about from all that she had told him. Of course he remembered that awful period of Paramore's darker days. Those nights where none of them could be in the same room together, Josh unable to look at Hayley and inadvertently making her cry, and everyone having a hard time being happy. It had been almost two years since that and she still blamed herself for all of it when it wasn't all on her. In her mind, she still believed that her failed relationship with Josh was the cause of all the band's problems and that unnecessary guilt on her shoulders carried on to her and Oli.  
  
"You have got to stop thinking it's all your fault," Taylor retorted. "You're also assuming the worst before anything has even happened. I don't like seeing you so miserable, Hayles. There's a lot of issues you need to work out."  
  
Hayley groaned. "I already tried to work out these issues and they're still here. I don't know what to do, Taylor. Face it, I just can't be with anyone without screwing it all up. Now leave me alone."  
  
He didn't want to argue with her, so instead of going against what she wanted, he slowly got out of her bunk. "Fine. I'll leave, but I still don't think it's all your fault."  
  
With that, he closed the curtain again and headed out. If she wanted him to leave her alone, he was going to leave her alone. That didn't mean he was done. He was far from being done because he had to make her realize that she didn't deserve to be unhappy. Taylor may have not been able to convince her, but he knew there was one person that could.

 

 

 

* * *

  
Ever since that morning, Hayley had not been paying that much attention to the time. She knew she had to because Paramore's set was probably in an hour or so and there was no way she was going to miss that. Even if she didn't seem like she was in the mood to be on stage, she was going to put on a good show because she cared about all those people who came there for a reason. They came for music and she and her band were going to give it to them.  
  
She finally checked her phone for the time a while after Taylor had left and it turned out that she actually had less than an hour until the set. Apparently time flies when one was upset and she actually wanted it to fly by even faster so the band could just play their show and then go. Go far away where she didn't have to see, be around, or think about  _him_.  
  
They probably wouldn't see each other ever again after that. It wasn't like that was so difficult anyway, considering he lived all the way in Sheffield while she was in Franklin. That was just another reason why things wouldn't work out. It was fine for them to be thousands of miles apart when they were friends, but that would be a disaster in a relationship.  
  
But they could make it work. To stay happy, they wouldn't need to physically be with each other because they would do everything they could to make it seem like they were in the same place together. They would keep on talking on the phone, she would fly to the United Kingdom and spend a weekend with him. He would tour in the states and pass by her town to surprise her. Distance would be nothing to them.  
  
…And she was once again thinking of having a future with him. She had to stop it. That wasn't what she wanted. She didn't even know what she wanted anymore.  
  
Hayley screamed into her pillow, hating herself for having those feelings. It would've been better if they never met. That night he approached her on the street, she could've just walked away and that would've been the end of it. If only she had known beforehand what she was really going to get herself into when she met the guy covered in tattoos. That one guy who went from being some stranger to a person who meant so much to her.  
  
Her muffled screams ended when she heard footsteps. Someone was on the bus and she guessed that it was Taylor trying to talk to her again, so she pushed the curtain out of her way so she could get rid of him.  
  
She looked out of her bunk. "I thought I told you to leave."  
  
However, it wasn't Taylor standing outside her bunk. Instead it was someone else and they put their acoustic guitar down before sitting in the bunk across from hers.  
  
Josh.  
  
"Hey," he smiled. "Is it okay if I sit here?"  
  
She sat up. "It's your bunk, you don't need to ask."  
  
"Yeah, but from what Taylor told me," Josh rested his chin on his hand. "You want everybody to leave you alone."  
  
"You talked to him?" Hayley's eyes went wide. "What else did he tell you?"  
  
"He told me about you and Oli."  
  
She bit her lip. She had a feeling Josh would find out sooner or later, but shit, did he really have to find out so soon? She made a mental note to punch Taylor in the face later for opening his mouth. What did Josh have to say about all this?  
  
"I really  _really_  wish he didn't," Hayley muttered. "Okay, I kissed him, alright? I kissed Oli because I have feelings for him. I regret ever doing it because I don't want to be with him and I want these feelings to just go away. We just  _don't_  work."  
  
"You believe you guys won't work," Josh said. "Because of what happened with you and me. You think the same thing will happen all over again with him."  
  
Hearing that made Hayley sit herself down on the floor and lean against her bunk, once again covering her face with her hands. "So you understand."  
  
Josh shook his head and joined her on the floor, sitting beside her. "No. The real problem here is that you  _don't_  understand. We had a serious relationship that came to an end and you still haven't been able to move on from it. The reason why you haven't gotten past it is because after that ended, a series of fallouts happened and you think you're the cause of all these events. All because you were the one to end the relationship. To this day, that regret is still eating you up and it's getting in the way of you ever finding peace. Then you finally find a guy that could make you happy and what do you do? You decide to throw that all away because you still don't get that this  _isn't all your fault_."  
  
"I…I.."  
  
He didn't let her talk just yet. "I need you to understand this, Hayley. It wasn't your fault that our band almost broke up. I repeat: It. Was. Not. Your. Fault. You know what I really believe? That it was nobody's fault. We were all just kids who ended up being controlled by the press and because we were all young, we took everything the wrong way. We took it out on each other and it brought out the worst in us. I was a jerk after we broke up and I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like you were the reason the band wasn't going to last. I'm sorry if I made it seem like you weren't capable of having a good relationship."  
  
"Josh…" she was at a loss for words.  
  
"Let me say one more thing," his voice softened. "It was for the best that we broke up. I realize that now and since then, I've managed to grow from it. That's why I'm now in a relationship with Jenna because I know that I'm more mature and can actually have a healthy relationship without it affecting the sake of our band. Now it's  _your_  turn. You could grow from it, too. You could be in a great relationship with Oli without risking our band  _and_  his band's future because I know you could now. Nobody's stopping you but yourself. I care about you, Hayley, and you deserve to be happy."  
  
He placed his hand over hers and smiled, which made her respond with a smile of her own. This time, it was genuine because she understood everything now. Josh had helped her climb out of the dark hole of pointless guilt that she trapped herself in.  
  
She could care less about what the public would do. If they were going to keep doing their annoying tactics to make her seem like she wanted to steal the spotlight, then so be it. All that mattered was if she focused on her happiness and didn't let them get to her or Oli. She would be with him and it would work out because she was stronger this time.  
  
"You're right. In fact, you're more than right," she smiled wider. "I want to be with Oli, no matter what. I shouldn't be afraid anymore because things are different now. I've grown up, and you've helped me see that."  
  
"Anything to see my best friend smile again," Josh nodded.  
  
Hayley leaned over to hug him and then gave him a peck on the cheek. "Thank you, best friend."  
  
"You're welcome, best friend."  
  
It was a friendly little kiss on the cheek and nothing more, proving that they both had finally moved on. They were truly best friends and they were glad things were that way. Josh got up from the floor and offered a hand to Hayley so she could stand up as well. Heading out the bus, Hayley already began looking around. She had to find Oli and let him know that after all this time, he  _was_  the one person worth taking a chance for.  
  
Jeremy, Zac, and Taylor ran up to them. Jeremy was the first to speak. "There you guys are. We gotta head on stage soon and I heard that there's already a huge crowd waiting."  
  
"Wow," Hayley breathed. "I almost forgot we were here to actually perform."  
  
"I know," Zac grinned. "It's great. C'mon, we're not gonna give the best surprise show ever if we just stand here. Let's go!"  
  
They all started rushing to where the main stage was, but Hayley didn't go as quickly as they did. She was too busy looking around, wishing she could have some more time to find Oli. It was a little too late for that, so she had to wait to tell him until after the show.  
  
But then again…maybe she didn't have to wait.  
  
There  _was_  another way.

 

 

 

* * *

  
Meanwhile, Oli had been sitting outside where he had last talked to Hayley. He leaned against the bus and looked up at the sky, watching the small clouds slowly glide over the city. Ever since Bring Me the Horizon finished their show, he had separated from everyone else to be alone and it was probably the best idea he had all day. Nobody had bothered to look for him yet and he didn't hear any voices to interrupt his thoughts.  
  
Though that didn't mean he was okay. He was calm at the moment, but not okay and all his thoughts were still of the girl with the bright colored hair that he had managed to fall for. And he fucking fell  _hard_.  
  
He had replayed all the events that happened that day in his head. Over and over again in his mind, he'd just see himself kissing her and then it'd go to her rejecting him and singing that horrible song to tell Oli she didn't want him. Then her explaining to him the harsh reality of how their relationship would turn out and last of all, that cold, hard stare she gave him while he was on stage. Why the fuck did it have to hurt so much?  
  
All he wanted was her, but that was near impossible and she already expressed how she felt about it. Her mind was made up and he was left to drown in the feelings that would never fade away. He was pathetic.  
  
He wasn't alone for long because he heard someone walking up to him and that someone turned out to be Lee. Out of all the people that could've approached him, he was slightly relieved that it was Lee since he was the only one that Oli had told about Hayley. That way he wouldn't have to lie about why he was being so antisocial.  
  
Oli looked up at him. "If you came here to comfort me, it's not really going to do anything. But thanks anyway."  
  
"I'm just here to tell you that Paramore's going to be playing soon," Lee apprised. "Thought you'd at least want to know."  
  
At this information, he was surprised how long he had been there since he had forgotten what the time was. He couldn't believe how time passed so quickly already and then he started wavering slightly at the thought of seeing her. He was completely unsure if he was emotionally ready to watch them.  
  
"I d-don't know," he stuttered. "Maybe I should, uh, just, uh, stay here. It's nice."  
  
"That's a very poor excuse, but whatever," Lee shrugged. "I thought that if you really cared about Hayley, you'd still watch the show to support her. You know, because she did that for you. But if you want to stay, then I'm leaving you here."  
  
At Lee's words, Oli scrambled to his feet and frowned at his friend. "I changed my mind. I'm going."  
  
She wasn't the only one that made promises and he wasn't going to let himself chicken out. Just because they weren't in the best of situations, that didn't mean he could break his promise to her. He wasn't that kind of person.  
  
That promise had caused him to end up in the audience that had gathered around the main stage. When the others had told him just how packed it was for Paramore, he already expected to be crammed in between tons of fans waiting to watch the "surprise special guest". Because of how Cleveland's amphitheater was structured, there was no side of the stage for them to stand at. The only other choice was behind Paramore, but he didn't want to just see their backs. He wanted to see their faces. He wanted to see  _her_  face. Even if that meant he had to practically suffocate in the middle of all those sweaty bodies.  
  
One person at the front started chanting "Paramore!" and their friends backed them up by chanting along with them. Then more people started to join in until the whole entire crowd was cheering for the band to come out, the loud chants echoing throughout the amphitheater. Oli was among the few people who weren't yelling and instead just looked ahead at the stage, counting down the minutes the band had until showtime. The chants got louder and were beginning to speed up, everyone raising their hands in the air each time Paramore's name came out their mouths. These chants then turned into screams and finally, they had come out on the stage. Hayley came out last and the screams got even louder when she raised her hand that held the microphone wrapped in her signature colored tape.  
  
They opened up with "Misery Business" and the crowd went wild. Oli had to admit, it was a good start to get everyone's adrenaline pumping. People started jumping and Hayley herself was jumping all over the stage and looked like she was having the time of her life. It was hard to believe she had looked so serious and quiet earlier and Oli was amazed by her movements and voice. She actually looked like she really was enjoying everything and he felt like she had been replaced with a different person. The smile on her face even looked real.  
  
That's because it  _was_  real. Bad day or not, Hayley loved her fans and would never do anything to disappoint them. Oli knew that. What he didn't know was that she had other things in mind besides keeping the crowd satisfied. He was unaware that she had already spotted him in the crowd. He didn't want to be too close to the front, but he wasn't stuck in the very back either. Oli made sure he was a good distance away from the stage so he wouldn't be seen, but nevertheless, she still saw him.  
  
There was no doubt he would ever get tired of watching her on stage. The wind caused her hair to flow behind her, sweeping her bangs out of her face to expose her shining green eyes. When she danced, her hips would sway to the rhythm of the drums and it made everyone want to dance along with her. And that  _voice_. That vibrant and energetic voice that always engulfed him. This continued with each song that Paramore played the whole time, Oli was gazing at her. He ignored the numerous people bumping into him while he stood there dazed by every action that came from her.  
  
Like all great shows, their set had to come to an end. Paramore was going to play one more song, but before the song could begin, Hayley walked up to the mic stand to put her microphone back in it, ready to speak up. The crowd grew quiet so they could hear what they had to say.  
  
She smiled at everyone before taking a deep breath. "This last song is for someone very important to me."  
  
Oli froze.  
  
"And he's in the audience right now."  
  
Various people began muttering to each other and looked around for this "mysterious person" Hayley was talking about while Oli had lost his ability to breathe properly. On the inside, he was freaking out and with so many people surrounding him, he was trapped. He couldn't believe she had actually said that. In front of  _everyone_. He was the only one out of those hundreds of people that knew she was referring to him. That also meant she had known he had been watching her perform the whole time and he didn't know what more she could do to him that made his heart beat a mile a minute. He seriously had no idea what her intentions were. Whatever the last song was going to be, she was going to be singing it directly to him. Was he even going to last?  
  
Josh started playing and when everyone recognized the familiar guitar intro, they were back to screaming excitedly and cheering. Oli had also recognized it, only his reaction was far more different. His eyes widened and he clutched his stomach, that horrible pang coming back to him.  
  
She was going to be singing "I Caught Myself".  
  
The same song she sang to him after their kiss. The song that was like a slap in his face. She used that song to tell him that she should've never kissed him or thought of him because that was not what she wanted. It was like another way of her telling him goodbye. Hearing it the first time was hard enough, but him having to listen to it a second time—this time in front of a lot of strangers—was overkill. He was already suffering enough from her earlier rejection, what more did she want from him?  
  
 _You got it, you got it, some kind of magic.  
Hypnotic, hypnotic, you're leaving me breathless.  
I hate this, I hate this, you're not the one I believe in  
With God as my witness._  
  
And all these people were singing along. They had no idea what the story behind this was and he honestly didn't want to be there at all anymore. So he began making his way toward the back so he could get out of there as the song went on. People were being difficult and with each step, it got harder for him to get through. While he struggled to make an exit, the song came to the bridge. The bridge had become his least favorite part because of the words and the memory of the look she gave him as she sang them. This made him try even harder to get out of there.  
  
But he stopped when Hayley brought the mic up to her lips and sang lyrics.  _Different_  lyrics.  
  
 _I know what I want.  
And I know that it's you_  
  
He turned around to face her, knowing that those weren't the ones she had originally written. Oli had heard that song enough to remember what the real ones were. When he looked at her again, she was looking right back.  
  
 _Keep pushing and pulling me down, and I know in my heart that it's you._  
  
Hayley had raised her hand and pointed to him, causing everyone else to turn and look at Oli. This was when he really didn't know what to do because when it was revealed that he was the one she had been talking about, everyone around him had decided to move away from him. Then it all made sense why she was doing this. She wasn't doing this to hurt him. She was doing this because she wanted him and he wanted her more than anything.  
  
 _Now when I caught myself, I didn't stop myself  
I'm saying something that  
I should've always thought of you._  
  
Oli took a step forward and more people had backed away, clearing a path for him. Eventually, there was an open space leading to her and all he had to do was make his way up to the stage. Hayley was right there, a grin across her face as she sang and the audience had started clapping and were cheering him on. His lips slowly formed into a smile as he looked at the girl waiting for him. She wasn't going anywhere.  
  
 _Now I know what I want._  
  
He started walking faster and it got to the point where he was almost running to her. As he got closer, he didn't even care if there were a bunch of people around him. His eyes were only on her and he felt his heart being rapidly when he finally reached the stage. Without hesitation, he climbed up and before he knew it, they were face to face. She looked up at him in wonder as she finished the song.  
  
 _I want…_  
  
Oli moved closer and she felt her cheeks heat up.  
  
 _I want…_  
  
He had leaned forward even more and she was close to meeting him halfway. The audience was watching in disbelief, astounded at the scene that was happening before their eyes.  
  
 _I should've always thought-"_  
  
They closed the gap in between them and their lips finally met again. Hayley let the microphone slide through her fingers and wrapped her arms around him. Oli's hand cupped her cheek and his other hand held her waist, not wanting to pull away. She pulled him closer and all she could think about was how she was truly crazy about him and that she was stupid for almost letting him go. She wasn't ever going to make that mistake again.

And there was Oli, who couldn't stop smiling and all he wanted at the moment was to keep kissing her. The kiss was different. This time, it just felt so  _right_  and he loved the feeling of her in his arms again. It was then that they knew that it was indeed possible that they could have a wonderful future. Just him and her, together and happy. Nobody, especially the media, was going to get in the way of that.

Reluctantly, they parted to regain their breath. Their foreheads were touching and he was still holding her while they heard everyone going wild. The audience was absolutely thrilled to be witnessing this and Hayley and Oli just smiled at all of them, having forgotten that people were watching. She then gave quick glances to her bandmates, who were glad to see that she was happy and behind the stage was Oli's band, who were all giving a thumb's up.  
  
"Did you find the only exception?" Oli asked her, obviously teasing.   
  
Hayley laughed. "Yes, I did."  
  
She gave him a quick kiss, enjoying the sensation that his lips provided each time. The best part was that there was no fear in her anymore and in place of that fear was  _peace_.  
  
"It's you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longest chapter for this fic. I like it that way because this was the most important part of this story. I'm happy with how it turned out, too. Also, I've been waiting to write this because the events that happened in the chapter were the only things I planned out when I first thought of this story idea. 'Twas really exciting to write.
> 
> Anyway, one more chapter left! Thanks to those who have read this story. Please tell me what you think. Comments are very appreciated. (:
> 
> -Aliya


	5. I Know in My Heart That It's You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Using the "B" word and saying goodbye.

After what happened at the surprise show, it was expected that fans from both Paramore and Bring Me the Horizon had a lot to take in. It wasn't an every day occurrence for them to witness the two lead vocalists of two very different bands making out, which meant that there were different reactions to this event. Some fans—mostly of the female gender—responded with high-pitched squeals while others had more of a "holy shit" reaction. Few had even claimed they saw this coming. Whatever their reactions were, it revolved around Hayley and Oli's big concert kiss.  
  
This brought up plenty of questions from people when they managed to approach the bands afterward. Of course, since it all happened at Paramore's show, Hayley had to deal with more questions than Oli did, mainly from a group of three girls who couldn't stop saying how cute they were together. This actually amused her and she was surprisingly handling things well about her newfound relationship. For one, she wasn't trying to hide this from anyone like she had done before and she was able to draw all the attention away from herself to give the rest of the band the credit they deserved.  
  
From the group of girls, the one with blonde hair was the first to speak. "Your show was amazing! And seriously, you singing for that guy and kissing him at the end was  _so_  cute!"  
  
Her friend, a brunette, cut into the conversation. "So, is this guy your boyfriend?"  
  
"Boyfriend?" Hayley repeated, the word suddenly sounding foreign to her. It had been so long since she let that word come out her mouth and it was strange to be saying it after what seemed like forever. At that moment, she looked past the girls to see Oli waving at her and standing a good distance away so the girls wouldn't notice him. She grinned at him and her heart started beating fast again as he flashed her a smile. It took just a simple question and mention of the "B" word for it to hit her that yes, Oli had become this word. The word that she wasn't afraid of saying anymore. "Yeah, I guess he  _is_  my boyfriend now."  
  
"Awww," they all gushed and sighed in admiration.  
  
"But he's not just my boyfriend," Hayley pointed out. "His name's Oli and he's in a band called Bring Me the Horizon. They're an incredible band and you guys should check them out. But I'll talk all about this later. Right now, you all should definitely chat with Josh, Zac, Jeremy, and Taylor. Our show wouldn't have been amazing if it weren't for them."  
  
The three girls then left to find the other bandmates and that finally gave Oli the chance to walk up to her.  
  
She reached out and held his hand. "Hey, you."  
  
"Hey to you, too," he smirked as their fingers intertwined. "Boyfriend, huh?"  
  
Hayley smirked back at him. "How much did you hear?"  
  
"All of it," he chuckled.  
  
"Well, you should thank me," she laughed and rolled her eyes. "I just gave your band three new fans."  
  
"Depending on how they are, they  _might_  be new fans," Oli joked. "Our music seems to scare girls away."  
  
"You didn't scare  _me_  away," she told him.  
  
"Yeah," he nodded. "I didn't."  
  
"And I'm glad you didn't."  
  
"I am, too."  
  
She kissed his cheek and they began walking toward the buses, her hand still in his. Oli looked down at their hands, realizing that it had been a while since he had ever held hands with anyone and he never thought he'd end up holding hands with Hayley. Just last year they had met because he happened to be in her town and he found her sitting alone on the sidewalk. Back then, he saw her as a girl from a band who needed help and whatever she needed help with, Oli walked up to her in hopes of giving it to her. All because of that, she became more than just a girl who needed help. She ended up being one of his closest friends. She was someone who was always there to help  _him_. Then a surprise show brought them together again and that was when everything changed. They weren't just friends. Not anymore.  
  
"But really," Oli said. "You told those girls I was your boyfriend."  
  
"I did, didn't I?" Hayley mused. "I meant it, too. You're my boyfriend."  
  
"And you're my girlfriend," he dragged out the last word. "This is really happening. We're really calling each other these, aren't we?"  
  
She giggled. "We are. I'm trying to get used to it."  
  
"Might take us a while," he grinned. "But I like the thought of Hayley Williams as my girlfriend."  
  
"And who would've thought I'd end up having Oli Sykes as my boyfriend?" Hayley teased. "Hmm, I think I'm getting used to these titles already."  
  
He stopped walking. "I've been meaning to ask you...what made you change your mind anyway? What made you go from not wanting to be with me to kissing me on stage?"  
  
Hayley beamed and looked up at him. "Let's just say someone helped me realize that being with you is more important than worrying about stupid tabloids and paparazzi. I never should've pushed you away, Oli. You mean a lot to me and I'm not going to let anything ruin our chances of being happy together."  
  
Oli's smile grew even wider, revealing his teeth. Her words made his cheeks flush a reddish hue and he had never felt this happy before. He lifted a hand to brush her hair out of her face and pressed his lips to hers, which Hayley responded to by deepening the kiss. Like he said, this was really happening and nothing meant more to him than being with her. Every time their lips touched, his heart was pounding in his chest and he always found it hard to pull away. His hazel eyes met her green ones when they parted and his thumb ran along the curve of her cheekbone, which made her nestle into his hand. She enjoyed his warmth and they stood there for a while, refusing to let each other go.  
  
He was hers. She was his. They didn't want it any other way.  


 

* * *

  
Warped Tour was wrapping up for the day. The sun was starting to set and people were leaving the venue, raving about all the great bands that played. Almost everyone who had went that day went on and on about how that was possibly the greatest day out of the whole tour. People couldn't quite confirm that it was since there were still many dates to come, but they could agree that it was one of the most memorable dates so far.  
  
Merch booths and equipment were being packed away, which meant that the bands had to be heading out as well. It was time to say goodbye to Cleveland because everyone was going to be moving on to Mississauga. Though, not  _everyone_  was going to be there.  
  
The day ending also meant that Paramore's day off was coming to a close and instead of following everyone to Canada, they were supposed to be rejoining No Doubt on their summer tour in Indiana. Sadly, this made them realize that they were once again separating from their friends for God only knows how long. It could be a few months or another year, but nobody knew for sure exactly how long it would be.  
  
This was what ran through Hayley and Oli's minds as they stood by their buses. Paramore's things were loaded onto the bus and the bus driver had started the vehicle, meaning Hayley was going to be leaving soon. Oli knew that this was going to happen and he wished the day hadn't gone by so fast. He would've given anything to have just one more day with her. They had finally realized how much they cared for each other and yet they had to say goodbye  _again_. Yes, this was already expected and they both were aware that there were going to be times when they wouldn't be able to see each other for weeks, but it still sucked.  
  
It didn't just suck for them. All of Paramore and Bring Me the Horizon, as happy as they were that Hayley and Oli had gotten together, were also bummed that they didn't get to hang out as much compared to those three months of spending time together in 2008. Which is why all of them were exchanging hugs and heartfelt goodbyes before Paramore took off. Though Hayley didn't really want to admit it, some of the things they said almost made her tear up. She always got so emotional during these things.  
  
Nicholls was the first one to come up to her. "Never easy saying bye, huh?"  
  
"I never like saying bye," Hayley agreed with a chuckle. "Especially to you guys. Have fun for the rest of Warped."  
  
"Eh, I'll try," Nicholls sighed. "It's not the same without you all. You had a great show today, by the way. Not to mention, we're all glad Oli finally found the right girl and we're very glad that she turned out to be you. Take care, Hayley."  
  
She smiled and gave him a hug. "I'll see you around, Matt."  
  
"And don't worry. We'll make sure he's in one piece for the next time he sees you."  
  
Laughing, she shook her head. "Nice to know."  
  
Meanwhile, Oli was talking to Josh. There were a just few things that Josh had to say to him before they left, even though he knew he didn't really have to say them. Josh had hung out with Oli enough to know that he was a good guy, but he still cared for Hayley's well-being.  
  
"Take care of her, alright?" Josh said. "I know you'll make her very happy."  
  
"Of course I'll take care of her," Oli looked over to where she was. "You know I will."  
  
"Yeah, I do," Josh put an arm around him. "Now go to her. Looks like she's ready to say goodbye to you."  
  
Hayley had just finished saying bye to Lee and was standing alone, twiddling her thumbs. Oli took a deep breath and made his way to her, holding her hands once he reached her. She tried her best to keep a cheerful demeanor, but it was clear in her eyes that she was just as sad as she was happy.  
  
"So…" she breathed. "This is it."  
  
"You're going one way and I'm going the other," Oli lifted her chin and their eyes locked. "Can't you just come with me so we can be on tour together again?"  
  
Hearing that made her laugh and she had even wanted to cry at the same time, but she didn't want him to see her like that. "I really wish I could. If I didn't have to go to Indiana, I'd let you carry me onto that bus and we'd be on our way."  
  
It took every ounce of him not to do that. Every single ounce. Instead, he laughed along with her and lightly squeezed her hand and kissed it.  
  
"When will I see you again?" he finally asked.  
  
"I honestly don't know," she answered. "But it won't be a year this time. We'll see each other soon."  
  
"We  _will_  see each other soon and I'm making it happen," Oli assured her. "Once we're both off tour, I'm coming for you. I promise."  
  
They  _were_  going to work. They lived thousands of miles apart, but that wasn't going to be a problem. Whatever it took, he was going to do everything he could to see her and no matter what the distance was, it wasn't going to stop them from caring for each other. They were strong enough to deal with a long distance relationship and they were going to have a future together. She believed what he said and that just made her hold him tightly, savoring the moment with him before she stepped onto that bus.  
  
The rest of her bandmates had already gotten into the huge vehicle. Taylor pulled down the window and yelled out to get her attention. "Hayley, come on! We gotta go!"  
  
"I'm coming!" she yelled back and then faced Oli again. "I have to go."  
  
He pulled her closer. "I guess this is goodbye."  
  
"Goodbye," she leaned in. "For now."  
  
"I'm coming for you. Remember that."  
  
"I'll be waiting."  
  
She crashed her lips into his and they shared one last kiss. Time had stood still and he felt like the day was never going to end as long as his lips were against hers, but he eventually made himself pull away so she could finally get on the bus. He let her hand slowly let go of his and she went inside, the door closing behind her. Hayley appeared in the window and waved at him as the bus began to move. He waved back at her with a grin on his face and kept his eyes on the bus until it was no longer in his line of sight.  
  
"Goodbye," he whispered.  
  
Lee came up to him to pat his shoulder and then insisted that the band go back to putting away their own equipment, but gave Oli a few minutes to be alone.  
  
Oli stared at the empty space where the bus was once parked. The lot where all the bands were was nearly empty and it was only a matter of time until he would be leaving, too. Minutes passed and the sun was going down even more, but he didn't leave that spot. Strangely, he was okay. He would've expected himself not to take her departure as well, but he did and he was actually feeling the exact opposite of sad.  
  
He didn't move until he heard Lee's voice again. "Everything's set. You ready to go?"  
  
"Yeah, let's go."  
  
He took a few steps back and walked toward the bus with his friend. With that, they got on and were out of there, following the rest of the buses. He sat on the couch and looked out the window at the buildings that they passed by, smiling to himself once the image of Hayley entered his mind.  
  
She was gone, but it wasn't the end. For the next few weeks, he would continue to perform on Warped Tour, she would be back to being an opening act for No Doubt, and they would return to contacting each other via late night phone calls. But once both of the tours were over and once Oli was back home, the first thing he was going to do was buy a one way ticket to Nashville. He would get on that flight and make his way back to Hayley just like he promised.  
  
He always kept his promises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to anyone that has read this. It means a lot to me and this story was really fun to write. (:
> 
> Keep an eye out for the next installment of this series! Once again, thank you and please tell me what you think!
> 
> -Aliya


End file.
